From Surviving to Thriving with Self-Care
I discovered the only way to get from surviving to thriving was through Self-Care. This meant more than practicing my yoga, meditation, taking care of myself physically. This meant I would have to really take care of myself. In order for me to move forward, I would have to learn to love myself unconditionally and completely. I would have to learn to honor myself just like I would anyone else. I would have to become my own best friend and practice the 4 Pillars of Self Care.
Self care encompasses a variety of methods and ways of taking care of your well-being and happiness. This includes anything from brushing your teeth every morning to taking the time out to do something you love. But let’s go deeper, really deep. Let’s get to the core of you and connect with your beliefs and feelings of who you are right now. Your inner child. That part of you that is still reacting to the beliefs, thoughts, and emotions from your negative experience. That part of you that is holding you back from expanding into a whole new positive world. The way to do this is to address the 4 Pillars of Self Care–Self-Worth, Self-Trust, Self-Esteem, and Self-Love.
Probably the first pillar you want to address. It’s how we value ourselves. Self-worth comes from your deepest thoughts. It’s a recognition and understanding of all your past thoughts, beliefs that you have been surrounded by in our social world. For example, “I am worth it” statement can cause different emotions depending on what your concrete thought/idea is. And only this belief came from a deep thought process and repeated statements that you have come to believe to be true. It’s the very basis of your foundation of Self-Care.
We’ve all played this game before. The second-guessing game. We have come to doubt our own thoughts. We have been programmed to react differently than what we instinctively feel is the right thing for us. What we are told to believe becomes counter-intuitive to our own internal beliefs. And so we learn to second guess ourselves and mistrust our own thoughts.
Self–esteem is what we think and feel and believe about ourselves. We evaluate and judge ourselves, becoming our worst or best critic. We tend to evaluate every experience and make our decision. When a negative experience has played a part in shaping our lives, we have “wired” our brains into focusing on the negative attributes far more than our positive attributes. The same goes for a positive experience. When a positive experience happens, it builds our Self-Esteem.
It’s hard to love yourself when you are beating yourself up. Going through a traumatic experience can cause the non-existence of Self-Love. Self-love is all about treating and respecting yourself in the highest standards. Treating yourself like the Queen that you are! Giving yourself unconditional and non-judgemental consideration of full blissful love!
So let’s dive into the healing process through strengthening 4 Core Pillars of Self Care:
When my world fell apart, practicing self-care changed everything for the better. For most of my life, I was one of the lucky ones – I never knew poverty or much loss, was neither diagnosed with a serious illness nor hooked on a substance.
Then, in my forties, it happened. With no warning at all, everything changed. My life as I had known it for decades was over. Poof. Gone. Pretty much overnight. The details are irrelevant, but what does matter is this: I thought I had lost it all, but in reality, through losing it all, I had the opportunity to find it all.
From Surviving To Thriving
I discovered that the only way to survive the unraveling of my life was to practice self-care. And then I recognized that, amazingly, self-care and self-love can propel us into not just surviving, but into thriving. In my darkest moments, I understood that the way to put one foot in front of the other was to start loving myself wholly and unconditionally.